I'm not sure why certain cities get the cold shoulder. Why is Cleveland the object of so much scorn from stand-up comedians? I hear it's a wonderful city. But apparently, Canadians really hate Toronto, so much so that a movie has been made about it. According to an article on cnn.com, "The dislike of Canada's biggest city, Toronto, in the rest of the country runs so deep that a filmmaker has made a documentary about it." The filmmaker and co-director Albert Nerenberg said in an interview, "There is something different (about hating Toronto). People are more passionate about it ... People have a grudging respect for New York outside of the city, and have a grudging respect for London. But people outside of Toronto don't have that for Toronto, they really don't." Joey Keithley, of the Vancouver punk band D.O.A., says in the film, "People in Toronto are soulless, one-eyed corporate zombies." That's funny, someone over the weekend told me the exact same thing about Dallas, Texas.

Let's imagine you are the star of a movie and your character is running from the cops. If they caught up to you, how would you want your character to react? Beat them with your bare hands? Mow them down with a hail of bullets? Kung Fu their asses? How about squirting them with breast milk? Sound strange? Well, sometimes truth really is stranger than fiction. According to an article on the londonpaper.com, "An 18 year old woman is due in court today after being accused of spraying a policeman with breast milk." The incident allegedly occurred after she was apprehended for stealing a pair of shoes. As the cops (or Bobbies, as they're called in England) restrained her, she pulled out her right breast and squirted them with her mother's milk. Take that, pigs!

For you music fans, the new Nine Inch Nails album Year Zero is out. And it rocks! Go listen to it then buy it. Trent Reznor never ceases to amaze me. He's a friggin' rock machine! Really. This particular album is very beat-driven, unlike the last album With Teeth, which was very rock driven. But this seems like a very natural progression from the last record. I read a few months ago that Trent was inspired by the sound landscape (not the rapping) of old Public Enemy records, and I can definitely hear that influence in songs like "The Great Destroyer" and "Me, I'm Not." The way the bass and snare sounds are layered under sounds of static and explosions are definitely right out of Public Enemy's playbook. But Trent incorporates those beats into a Nine Inch Nails song structure. Very cool stuff. Oh... you came to read about the news. Sorry. Let's move on...

Any sports fan that has ever had an issue with a referee has finally gotten their payback. According to an article on cnn.com, "The veteran NBA referee [Joey Crawford] was suspended indefinitely by Commissioner David Stern for his conduct toward Tim Duncan, who contends the official challenged him to a fight during a game in Dallas." Crawford, veteran NBA ref who has been causing fans grief for 29 seasons, allegedly was upset with Tim Duncan, who he believed was laughing at him during a game between the San Antonio Spurs and the Dallas Mavericks. Tim Duncan claimed he was laughing at his teammate, who had just received a foul call from Crawford. But Crawford was pissed anyway and gave a couple of technicals to Duncan, which meant an automatic ejection. Duncan wasn't so pleased with that. According to my main man Duncan, "He looked at me and said, 'Do you want to fight? Do you want to fight?' If he wants to fight, we can fight. I don't have any problem with him, but we can do it if he wants to. I have no reason why in the middle of a game he would yell at me, 'Do you want to fight?'" Commissioner Stern was not so pleased that Crawford ejected one of the most popular players in the NBA for giggling and stated, "Although Joey is consistently rated as one of our top referees, he must be held accountable for his actions on the floor." That's right, bitch. Game over!

And finally, our thoughts and prayers go out to the students at Virginia Tech. When these students were supposed to be having the time of their lives, they unfortunately experienced one of the worst tragedies in United States history. Please pray for the victims of 4/16/2007. Peace.

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