| Written by Ed Lamaze,
on 08-28-2008
|
Views : 465  |
 Gabba gabba hey, gabba gabba hey!
“Man,” I thought. “What cool kids I've got.” They were sitting in the living room engrossed in what I thought was a rock-u-mentary chronicling the storied punk rock band, The Ramones. I could hear them chanting—Gabba, gabba.
Cool! I sat down to catch the program myself. Granted, I'm not a huge Ramones fan but I appreciate their music and I figured a documentary about them would surely be pretty interesting.
“That's not Joey Ramone,” I said to no one in particular and everyone just the same.
“Who's Joe? Dad, that's DJ Lance.”
“What in the world are you guys watching?” I asked a little
heartbroken, my pride bubble having just been exploded with the visage
of my kids engrossed with a group of fuzzy puppets gett'n jiggy wit a
DJ in a furry orange fez.
“Dad!! It's Yo Gabba Gabba!” they collectively shouted at me, insinuating “be quiet and let us watch the show!”
I sat. I watched. In silence. In stunned disbelief.
Halfway through the show I felt as if the acid I just dropped was
starting to kick in. Or maybe the shrooms were turning on me. Either
way, this trip was getting freaky!
Have you seen this show? Wild ride, man! Wild. This guy, DJ Lance
takes you on a journey each day with his fuzzy, puppet-like buddies:
Muno the red cyclops, Foofa the pink flower bubble, Brobee the little
green one, Toodee the blue cat-dragon and Plex the robot. I'm not
making this up!
Each episode focuses on a theme pertinent to kids and communicates
that message with pithy repetitive dialogue and beatbox based music.
At one point in the show, DJ Lance hands a plastic bag to one of the
Gabbas and the music starts—try it, you'll like it! Try it, you'll like
it! Over and over and over. He was trying to get one of the Gabbas to
try a new snack, avocado I believe. What kid eats avocado for a
snack?!
I could swear he handed the dude a dime bag and then relentlessly goaded him into trying it.
You see, that's how it all starts. Some happy dude in a fuzzy hat hands
you a baggie and says, “First one's on me, kid. Go ahead, it's all
good!”
During another segment, one of the Gabbas drops a piece of bread on
the ground. Immediately he stoops to get it and is about to eat it when
the scene flashes to the microbes on the bread who start a beatbox loop
of their own--"We're tiny! We'll make you sick! We're tiny! We'll make
you sick!"
Whatever happened to the five second rule? Jeez! I mean, around
here, unless you drop your food in the toilet, it's still edible. Pick
it up. Wipe it off. And eat it. Do you know what a loaf of bread costs
these days?
I guess the final frontier of absolute weirdness came during the
Cool Talents section of the program. Picture flashed to a guy who
played Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. By squeezing his clasped hands
together making fart sounds. Key of G, I think it was.
Now I'm all about appreciating a good stupid human trick, but not during my kids programming. It's a bit too much to swallow.
My advice to you. If you dare to partake of the trippy ride that is Yo
Gabba Gabba, bring a safety buddy. Trust me, you do not want to be
alone when it turns on you.
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